i AM myself
I hate looking myself in the mirror,I hate knowing I have fear.
I hate seeing what isn't there,I hate feeling that I am scared.
I hate believing what isn't true,I hate believing and trusting you.
I hate crying myself to sleep,
Forgive me for I have dreams.
I feel left out and all alone,With no one to call my own.
My eyes are red and I cry blood,
Please help me or I'll cry a flood.
My friends see what I let them see,
If they only could see the true side of me.
And as I die inside with pain,
Please don't think that I'm insane.
Cause believe it or not I have a heart,
That's been slowly torn apart
Cant you see that i love you so?
Sunday, February 11, 2007
mmm....today is boring day thus i 'm blogging....
well 1 week juz went by again..how fast time flies... sometimes its realily scary u know...
okay...on thursday i took my BTT...and i passed...but i redid my paper quite a number of times...
was inda worried tat i wld fail...(wk kept sayin i'll fail la....)..haha
okay on sat morning went down for trng at bedok reservior, trng was supposed to start at 10..then supposed to meet jon n wk at macs at 9 to teach them how to fold flowers...haha..
well jon was late n wk never showed up!!!( wk is a pig...always sleeping)..haha
n guess wat..i ran 1 round ard the reservior...okay wei ming was there today so i had company for the first half of the run...
haha,its gd tat he was ard if nt i think i would have walked instead of running...hahha
tried rowing the rengata k2 with hy was kinda unstable...but it was worst when i tried it with wei ming...haha we keep capping...like every few strokes we cap...then jon will have to save us...hahah...kinda paiseh though...
n afiqka was so so funny...she reali keep most of us laughing all day...
haha..well i'm suffering the aftermath of spending the day out yesterday...
had a terrible sunburn..red as a lobster..hahah..sure kena laugh at by my supervisor tmr...
muscle aching like crazy...dun even remb when was the last time tat i ran lydat...haha..
ohh...me n hy went for the NTU talk at suntec today...
got to know more abt the courses avialble...but it was reali packed...
also we saw a lot of ppl from tpjc there too...
okok..tats the boring life i'm living now...
haha..muz look harder for another job, n muz go shoppin for the things i need...
haha...
things aren't going well as i had expected...yet i feel helpless tat i could not do anything about it...
the origin.11:27 PM
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
well today i'm kinda tired but in the end still came online...haha...
as for today, me n jon took half day leave to chill out at marina square with hy,wee kang n mr chua...actually grace was suppose to be there also but last minute she had to go home...
well ...(miss u grace...hahah...cos nobody accompany home...heheh okay we had lunch then we went to kbox...hahah...from 3-6.45pm we were there la...
mr chua sang quite a nunber of songs n he was really entertaining...hahah
both me n huiying were quite lame tooo..haha...okay smthin is wrong with everyone today...
still we all had a great time there....
then its dinner at mac, but b4 tat we chatted for quite a bit about the life we had and wat we wanted in uni...haiz...
haha...finally we got down to ordering our food and it was more chit chattin...
wee kang left at about 9pm to pick andrea up at great world ( ohh,...isn't he nice???)...
the we left at 10pm n headed for home...guess all of us were tired...
well, the journey home was kinda lonely with no one to talk to...hahah
n i started thinking abt wat we all said today....
we did talk abt the a levels results, n yes i'm worried abt it...
really... like hy, i've got expectations to meet...cos it's not just abt me...
i'm afraid of failure...honestly i realli dunno wat i wld do if i do really terribly...
haiz...all i can hope is tat the results will turn out well...hahah...
i know its not the end of the world if u do badly..but its as gd as wasting ur time on smthing tat reaps no returns after all the hard work tat u have put in...
i know how the feelin is...n it totally sucks...
being worried is one thing...bu honestly wat else can we do? we can't turn back time or anything....so i guess like wat jon said 'wat'syours will be yours'...
n it does makes sense....hahah...( still i can't help but worry...)
i got to know smthin i shdn't today...but there's nothin i can reali do abt it...
i can't help it if you want to think this way...but all i can say is there are more things in life that are more worthy of your attention...
the origin.12:16 AM
i AM myself
alicia ang
19 yrs old
28th July 88
smps, hscs, tpjc, SIM- economic n management
likes:)
swimming, jogging, cycling, bladding, canoeing
reading, listening to music, dancing
chilling out with my friends
tpjc canoeing team ROCK!!!
tpjc 05S04 ROCK!!!
SIM Dragons rocks!!!
dislikes:(
ppl who are nt straight forward
ppl who pretend to be who they are not
being the middle person
being taken for granted
being left out
**wish list**
to get gd A-level results (my foot!))
to have FUN
to get a job ( ntuc Lhub)
to get my driving licence (got it)
to get my bag (been wanting to do so since the begining of the yr)
to chill out with my friends
to go clubbing as and when i like(like its ever possible)
to get into uni( got into one)
to be HAPPY (it has been so long since i'm really happy)
my voice
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